LOVE <3 LOVE <3

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

im so slack nowadaes. i reach home. i don feel like doing my work. i just feel like coming online. duno for wad. just feel like slacking. and sleeping. im lack of motivation. its eleven now. and im online. i still rmb those times, when i was sooo motivated. and stayed up and do my work till one. after a long dae. hahas. now, everything has change. and only god knows why.
i look at my tutorials. i feel sick. i cant settle myself down to get them done. im utterly disappointed. nvm. maybe after my tournament. yupps. i will reorganise my thots, and motivate myself again. i dont nid to depend on anyone. im a strong person. :) its okay. life still has to go on.
anyway. the main focus of today's entry would be how much good friends can make ur day. even when ur day started out horrible with the rumours, and the sight whereby everyone rushes to the library for the home cover page. and witnessing ur own freaking insensitive classmate passing uncouth comments right in front of u to some people whom he is not close to. i feel unjustice. i feel like slapping his face. if onli i could reach. if onli he can haf some emotional quotient.
i couldnt pay attention at all. in lectures and tutorials. i keep talking to vince and yaptse. i love to talk. haha. oh wells. at least they can be bothered to listen and to ask wads bothering me. at least they have the time to spare. at least i have their full attention. they dont listen and do other stuff at the same time like u do. i hate it when people do that to me. wads the point of calling when u dont even wan to talk. i dont understand. well, i dont hold it against u. cos i noe u are like that.
gym was horrible. i duno why. i felt as thou i was gonna break down. i was exhuasted. i couldnt focus on the things i do. and bang, the stupid weight slipped off my hands. and created a commotion. i was annoyed. snippets keep flashing back. i was annoyed by the thought of u. and the actual fact that i felt something after i pretended to feel nothing. i duno how long more i can act. i realli wonder if all these pretense will become a habit, a routine, a chore after long. actualli im rather afraid that the turmoil will fade. be it inside me or inside u. if they realli do, it will realli be the end. somehow, im still clinging onto a something. but i guess, theres nothing i will do. and obviously, there is nothing u will do too.
things got better. after watching the tennis girls play. they won. 3-2. close fight. nerve wreaking. and bonnie was actualli quite funny. ha ha ha. and i got lost along the bukit timah road, amongst the hwa chong pple. it was intemediating. but i guess, things realli happen for a reason. im glad that i went to watch the tennis match. cos i got to go and watch my beloved bao bei do her lion dance. although that retard forgot most of her steps. and yes. cheong yu hua was funny. hahaha. and i saw kerrin on 852. it was realli much of a coincidence. bcos i missed quite alot of buses. and the one i board was the one she was in. was happy when i saw her. and we agreed on meeting up for dinner tgt with hua. and when we were on the bus, we passed by macRitchie, and we tried our luck to ask if vien wans to join us for dinner. and to me and hua's surprises, she actualli said she dont mind.
so the four of us went out on an impromptu outing. the feeling was great. it jus felt like those days when we go out for lunch after we haf lessons back in cedar. or before going to my house for mahjiong. it jus made me feel happier. i wonder how i my dae wud be like if i were to go home. i think i will just die. we went to eat pasta. we ate like pigs. is realli alot. alot alot. i shant sae. haha. and me and kerr shared the ben and jerry's icecream we bought from ntuc. strawberry cheesecake flavour. wheee. and we went to take neo prints. i cant believe it larhs. i felt so childish. but happy. like wad i had said, they keep my troubles awae. im glad and blessed to have them in my life.
yes vien, friends forever.
yes girls, i love you all.

shedded at 7:59 AM